It’s pretty easy to give advice to someone, to tell a person what he or she should do, but taking actions, that’s something different. Certainly most people care about me, when they want to tell me how I should live my life and what I am supposed to do. But they are not me. It’s my life, and my decisions. I might not be perfect, neither are they, and I don’t want to be(come). I want to make mistakes, so please let me learn, let me grow, let me be me.
After going to college and getting my Bachelor’s degree, I worked for a few months at an IT company. It was much fun, and I learned a lot. But this job was temporary. And afterwards I decided to take three months off. I just needed a short break before actually starting my “post-college-work-life”. I’m currently looking for a new job, but this time I’d like to find a permanent one.
After all the learning, doing research for my bachelor’s thesis, and also working a full-time job and writing my thesis at the same time, I felt exhausted. Because of that job, I could save some money to afford the break I needed, and it felt very good. I finally had time to blog here on WordPress again – I took a break from that, too, while I was writing my thesis and working – and I had time to spend with my friends who I haven’t seen in a while.
Most of my friends and family understood that I needed some time off, but not all of them. Especially those who didn’t go to college kept saying: “that’s just school and no real work, why would you need a few months off?” Yes, okay. I “only” wrote a bit after reading some books. That’s no big deal, is it? Well, writing a thesis actually is a bit more than that. And going to college is not endless parties and stay in bed the whole day. At least, my college life was anything but that.
When I think of life, the image of a dancer passes through my mind. I really can’t dance, I can only oddly move to music. But I love to do that. It frees me. Music helps me to find my tune, my way to live my life. Dancing looks pretty easy when one can do it right. It’s hard work for the dancer, but the person in the audience who sees it, instantly wants to join the dance. Of course she can’t, because everything that looks so simple, isn’t that at all.
I don’t want to be judged for my decisons. I don’t have the perfect life, or the ideal CV, because I now haven’t worked in the past five months – well, I was writing on my book and some scripts, improving my English as it is not my mother tongue and my writing skills as well. I am also thinking of taking Spanish classes, because I always wanted to learn that language – but all that doesn’t count, of course. Only contracts do which I can add to my CV. Not working for a company, means to most bosses being lazy. And please don’t tell me that finding a good job is the easiest thing in the world.
If life was a Broadway musical, I’d love it even more – not only because I love theater so much, and hope to see another play on Broadway or even a musical in the near future. I now know that everywhere I go can be a stage, the audience is all around me, watching me as an artist of life. Realizing that makes me think differently of those who tell me I live the easy life, and chose to go to college because it’s simpler than working, and that I needed to relax after doing all the rest at college. Watching someone doing something is not hard at all, but actually doing something is very different.